I’d be lying if I said I had a great year... and a half. While my child brings me joy and I’ve been grateful to see her grow into a wonderful and sweet person, I know I’ve been depressed and in a very rough place. MY husband and I have (what feels like) frequent intense fights over lots of little things building up. Sometimes I totally understand why my husband is mad. Other times, I bitterly think he’s being unfair and lament that I am not the partner he needs. I’ve thought some pretty dark thoughts but I always pull myself back from that darkness because even if I think I’m pathetic and unworthy of my family… I need them and they need me.
Between all this and hating my job because it does not pay enough to provide for my family (and the fact teacher and I ideologically clash BIG TIME… Oh FUCK don’t get me started on her…), my creative spark has been gone. I browse Tumblr for the sake of it. I don’t want this. I want to draw and write again. I want to be genuinely happy all the time. I’m sorry I barely speak to my friends and I’m hoping I can slowly get better in 2016. Thank you everyone for your understanding and patience.